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In the whirlwind of modern life, where notifications ping incessantly, and deadlines loom like storm clouds on the horizon, finding a sense of calm can feel like searching for a needle in a haystack. But what if I told you that the key to staying grounded isn't about escaping the chaos but learning to dance with it?
As someone who has navigated the challenges of a high-pressure career, starting a business and having an active family life while striving to maintain inner peace, I have learned that staying grounded is not a destination but a journey. With the proper guidance, this journey can lead us to a place of balance and clarity, even as the world swirls around us.
The Eye of the Hurricane: Recognizing the Need to Ground Ourselves
Picture this: It's 7 AM, you've just gotten out of bed, your phone is already buzzing with emails, your calendar is packed tighter than a rush-hour Skytrain car (insert Vancouver reference here), and your to-do list seems to grow with each thought that enters your head. Sound familiar? In this scenario, which plays out for countless individuals every day in one way or another, it's easy to feel like a leaf caught in a gale-force wind, helpless and out of control.
But here's the thing: amidst this chaos lies an opportunity. An opportunity to find your center, to plant your feet firmly on the ground, and to remember who you are beyond the roles and responsibilities that threaten to define you.
"In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you." - Deepak Chopra
These words were a beacon for me when I felt like I was drowning in a sea of commitments and expectations. They remind us that grounding isn't about changing our external circumstances—it's about cultivating an internal sanctuary that we can return to, no matter what's happening around us. In my interpretation, these words spoke to the essence of what it was to be a creator of my life rather than a victim of it.
I've curated a host of practices, ideas and reflections to start your journey, and I hope you find them helpful. Finding your peace is about play and lightness. It's not about doing or being more than you already are. This is an important idea to hold as you replace the old with the new. I hope that you find them inspirational.
Rooting Down: Practices for Finding Your Center
The Power of Breath
One of the simplest yet most effective ways to stay grounded is through conscious breathing. I recall a particularly stressful day when juggling competing deadlines and family pressures. I felt like I was being pulled in a thousand different directions and at the end of my ropes. In a moment of clarity, I remembered this practice, closed my eyes, and took a deep breath.
Inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four, and hold for four. Repeat four times.
This simple practice, known as box breathing, became my lifeline. Navy SEALs use it to stay calm under pressure, and it's equally effective whether you're on a battlefield, in a boardroom, or dealing with a rambunctious and hormonal teenager.
Try this: Set a reminder on your phone to take three conscious breaths every hour or two, whatever fits your schedule. It's a small act of kindness you can extend to yourself that can significantly impact your sense of groundedness throughout the day and influence the results you get from your interactions.
Grounding Through the Senses
Our senses are powerful anchors to the present moment. When you feel overwhelmed, try this grounding exercise:
List five things you can see.
Touch four objects around you, and try things with different textures.
Listen for three distinct sounds.
Identify two scents you can smell.
Notice one flavour you can taste. I like using a small piece of dark chocolate for this one, allowing it to melt slowly in my mouth.
This practice, which I learned from a coaching program, has been transformative. It helps me escape the swirling thoughts in my head and brings me back to the tangible reality of my senses. I consider this place my home.
The Art of Saying No: Protecting Your Energy
In our fast-paced world, saying yes to everything can seem like the path to success. But I've learned—sometimes the hard way—that saying no is often the most powerful way to stay grounded.
I used to be a chronic yes-sayer. Board meeting? Yes. Extra project? Take on more clients? Yes. Of course. But all those yeses left me feeling stretched thin and disconnected from myself.
Learning to say no wasn't easy. At first, it felt uncomfortable, like I was letting people down. But I soon realized that by saying no to things that didn't align with my values or energy levels, I was saying yes to myself and what I life wanted to create. In this realization, I became the director of my life. Sure, there were moments that I would extend myself, but those became choices rather than driven by deep-rooted fears and feelings of inadequacy.
Journalling became a valuable tool to help me define the areas in my life where I was overextending myself.
Here is a reflection question for you to play with: What's one thing you can say no to this week that would give you more space to breathe?
Digital Detox: Finding Stillness in a Connected World
While incredibly useful, our devices can also be a major source of groundlessness. The constant stream of information and stimulation can unknowingly leave us feeling scattered and disconnected from ourselves. This is the Catch-22 that happens when we are overly attached to our devices. We can feel like we are staying on top of things and connected, which is true to some extent. However, our focus becomes too external, and we lose touch with tracking our thoughts, feelings, and energy levels.
I remember the first time I did a digital detox. It was just for 24 hours, but it felt like an eternity. I became fidgety and anxious, wanting to connect to my phone to ease this unrest. But as the hours passed, something shifted. I felt more present, aware of my surroundings, and in tune with myself. I was surprised that it didn't take long to unwind and that the intensity of that level of discomfort at the beginning. I fully appreciate the compelling draw of the phone.
Now, I make it a point to have regular periods of digital disconnection. It might be an hour in the morning, a full day on the weekend, or even a week-long retreat if I can manage it.
Try this: Start small. Choose one day a week to have a "no-phone morning." Use that time to connect with yourself, your loved ones, or nature.
I considered writing an article about Digital Detox and found that there is already a lot of amazing research and articles on the topic. If you want to learn more, I suggest this article.
Movement as Medicine: Grounding Through Physical Practice
Many are impacted by a sedentary, screen-dominated world. We often forget that we are physical beings. Our bodies are not just vehicles for our brains—they are an integral part of who we are, and connecting with them can be a powerful grounding practice and connect us to greater wisdom. Our bodies hold onto many of our experiences, both perceptually positive and negative. By paying attention to our bodies, we can learn what they need.
For me, this realization came through yoga. I started practicing as a way to heal and increase my flexibility after two hip replacements, but it became so much more than that. The simple act of moving my body mindfully, of connecting breath with movement, became a way to come home to myself.
But yoga isn't the only way. Any form of mindful movement can be grounding. It could be a walk in nature, a dance class, Tai Chi, or just stretching for a few minutes between meetings. Hold onto the idea that any movement is good, whether for one minute, one hour, or anything in between.
Reflection question: What form of movement connects you most to your body and the present moment?
The Power of Ritual: Creating Anchors in Your Day
In the unpredictable flow of modern life, rituals can serve as powerful anchors. They don't have to be elaborate or time-consuming—even small, consistent practices can help us feel more grounded.
A morning cup of tea. Not gulped down hastily while checking emails, but savoured mindfully. Challenge yourself to feel the warmth of the mug in your hands, inhale the aromatic steam, and take a moment to set an intention for the day.
This quick ritual, lasting no longer than five minutes, can help you start each day feeling healthy and centred, fully equipping you to face any challenges that may arise.
Try this: Create one small ritual you can incorporate into your routine. It could be lighting a candle before you start work, stretching before bed, or writing down three things you're grateful for at lunch. It doesn't matter what the ritual is, as much as it is done at a realistic and achievable cadence. Watch out for getting into a self-deprecating pattern if you miss a day. Be gentle when incorporating a new ritual or reigniting old ones. These are the ritual traps that can easily swallow us up.
Nurturing Connections: Grounding Through Relationships
Neglecting our relationships is easy—and I would argue too easy—in our quest for productivity and success. We forget that human connection is one of the most powerful grounding forces.
I am frequently reminded of this lesson as a passionate and driven person. It seems too easy to be engulfed by a particular project, task, or outcome. During a particularly challenging period in my journey, as I was trying to establish my business, I worked long hours, barely saw friends or family, and felt increasingly disconnected and ungrounded.
During a conversation with a mentor, I was brought back to myself. Her presence and reminder of who I was beyond my business and the goals I had was like a lifeline pulling me back to shore.
Since then, I've consciously prioritized meaningful connections, even when life gets busy. I've learned when to put away the laptop and not fill my calendar with work.
Reflection question: Who are the people in your life that help you feel most like yourself? How can you emphasize the value of these connections and create space for them?
Mindful Technology Use: Staying Grounded in the Digital Age
While we've discussed the importance of digital detoxes, technology is an integral part of our lives that is not going away. If we are honest with ourselves, we know that technology will become increasingly more a part of our lives. The key is learning to use it mindfully in a way that supports rather than undermines our sense of groundedness and well-being.
One practice that's been helpful for me is setting clear boundaries around technology use. For example, I don't use my phone while I eat dinner.
I've also found being more intentional about my social media use helpful. Instead of mindlessly scrolling, I set specific times to engage with social media. I'm selective about who and what I follow, curating a feed that inspires and uplifts rather than depletes me.
Try this: Use technology to support your grounding practices. Many apps can guide you through breathing exercises and meditation or even help you track your mood and energy levels. Although your preferences will play a big factor in what is right for you, here are a few that I have found helpful and recommend to clients depending on their goals.
MindJogger
Welletory
Calm
On your quest, you may find an app that resonates with you. Please don't hesitate to send it along. I'm always interested in hearing what works for people.
Embracing Imperfection: The Art of Letting Go
One of the biggest obstacles to staying grounded is our tendency to strive for perfection. We set impossibly high standards for ourselves and then feel unmoored when we inevitably fall short.
Learning to embrace imperfection has been a game-changer for me. It doesn't mean lowering our standards or not trying our best. It means recognizing that our worth isn't tied to our productivity or achievements. It means being kind to ourselves when things don't go as planned and that everything we take on in life is associated with a learning curve.
I remember my first group coaching offer. A project that I had poured my heart and soul into. I was devastated when it didn't turn out exactly as I'd envisioned and didn't get the uptake I had hoped for. However, a wise mentor reminded me that we often find the most growth and learning in the "imperfect" outcomes, and that was very much the case. This 'failure' evolved into a group leadership coaching program in which I've now had 95 participants and have run with several intact work teams.
Reflection question: What's one area of your life where you could benefit from loosening your grip on perfection?
The Practice of Presence: Mindfulness in Everyday Life
At its core, staying grounded is about being present. It's about showing up fully for our lives, moment by moment, rather than constantly living in the past or future.
Mindfulness doesn't have to mean sitting in meditation for hours (though that can be wonderful if it resonates with you). I've personally found a great deal of growth through the practice of floating. This sensory isolation is a gift to my nervous system and meditation practice. However, I am aware that this might not be for everyone.
I invite you to explore the simple practice of fully engaging in whatever you're doing, whether washing dishes, having a conversation, or working on a project.
One practice I've found helpful is what I call "mindful moments." Throughout the day, I take small pauses to engage my senses fully. I might take a moment to really taste my food, feel the sensation of my feet on the ground as I walk, or really listen to the sounds around me.
Try this: Set an intention to have three "mindful moments" each day. Notice how these brief periods of presence affect your overall sense of groundedness. This is a great practice to use as a reminder. I use the MindJogger App mentioned above, and my prompt is "Where am I?"
Cultivating a Gratitude Practice: An Anchor in Turbulent Times
Gratitude can be a powerful grounding force when life feels chaotic and overwhelming. It shifts our focus from what's lacking or challenging to what's present and positive.
I keep a gratitude journal, jotting down three things I'm grateful for each night before bed. On tough days, this practice helps me remember the good in my life and not get swept away—even if it's as simple as a warm cup of coffee, a kind word from a stranger, or a hug from my partner.
I've seen gratitude practice transform how people feel and think about their lives so much that I created a "Gratitude Journal" to support the development of a consistent and sustained practice. You can download it from my website to try it out.
Reflection question: What are three things you're grateful for right now?
Conclusion: Your Journey to Groundedness
Staying grounded in our fast-paced world isn't about achieving perfect zen-like calm. It's about developing practices and perspectives that help us return to our center repeatedly, no matter what life throws our way.
Remember, this is a journey, not a destination. There will be days when you feel completely grounded and others when you feel like you're being tossed about in a storm. The key is to be gentle with yourself, keep coming back to these practices, and trust in your innate capacity for centeredness and peace.
As you move forward from here, I invite you to choose one or two practices from this guide that resonate with you. Embrace a willingness to incorporate them into your life over the next week or two. Notice how they affect your sense of groundedness, stress levels, and overall well-being. Make tweaks, try new things and lean into the humaneness of this process. Remember, you are the creator, and you are worth it!
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